3 hours ago
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
I was watching people at the kids' school yesterday during the book fair and saw several women with multicolored streaks in their hair. Not highlights, but blue, pink, red, purple. Rainbow streaks, you would call it. And they were not the sort of women who really needed to be calling attention to themselves, you see. If you saw them on the street with plain hair they might not catch your eye, but with the hair it was "HEY! LOOKY HERE! I AM MIGHTY VISUALLY UNAPPEALING AND THOUGHT I WOULD MAKE IT WORSE BY GIVING MYSELF FRUIT STRIPE HAIR!" I just didn't get it.
Why is it that the freezer door never gets left open just an inch when it's stocked with things like cheap popsicles, white bread for communion or the 20 boxes of girl scout cookies you're hiding from the kids? No, it's when you have a stash of halibut fillets, or there was a great sale on sirloin burger or premium ice cream and the freezer is stocked with great stuff that something blocks the door open just enough to send it all into meltdown. And half the time it's when you are gone for a few days to boot.
I never realized how much of a redneck my in-laws thought I was until S.P. and I played "the Newlywed Game" at the wedding we went to last month. One of the questions was "what is his favorite home-cooked meal?" I said "porcupines", which most people know are the rice-speckled meatballs cooked in tomato sauce. After the game several of the extended family gathered around me to marvel, "do you REALLY eat PORCUPINES?" Hand to Heaven, they truly thought we eat porkies at our house. I wonder if they think we have an outhouse and a still in the backyard too....